Stop Being Interrupted: How to Model Key Behaviours

Kamala Harris, attorney and US Democratic VP nominee, was interrupted by current VP Mike Pence over 20 times during their recent 90 minute debate.

So every 4.5 minutes, he talked over her.

It’s caused a bit of a furore online because quite frankly, we women have all had enough of it.

Why do people interrupt?

Usually it is an attention and control ‘thing’: whomever is speaking, holds the metaphorical speaking staff and all eyes must be on them.

It can also be a superiority ‘thing’: “I have something more important to say because I believe I am smarter than you.”

Sometimes it’s a personality ‘thing’: extroverts for example are energised by discussion and their desire to interrupt isn’t necessarily about attention, control or superiority… they just get a high from being in the thick of the conversation.

And lastly, it might be a not listening ‘thing’: some people don’t actually listen to what their counterpart is saying and instead are thinking, “How can I get my point in? My point is more interesting than this. As soon as they take a breath I’ll jump right in.”

What did Kamala Harris do?

So Mike Pence continued to interrupt Kamala Harris (probably for control reasons) but she did a brilliant job in politely calling him out.

What I love about her response is how direct she was.

She points out she was already speaking. He interrupts again. She allows him to finish.

Then she looks at him directly, places her hand up and says:

She isn’t emotional. She is direct and firm.

Her final line is brilliant. She implies that without her input, there is no conversation (and also no purpose for either of them being there).

She nails it because she doesn’t get into the detail and start bickering…

She goes to a global topic – the conversation – and by forcing his agreement that a ‘conversation’ is actually what they’re both here for, she regains control of the debate.

What are your tips for dealing with people interrupting you? I’d love to hear them.

Rebecca

BIO: Rebecca Allen has coached hundreds of female managers over the last decade to help them realise their true potential and become their brilliance. Our virtual courses are designed to empower you to take control of your career, pave the way to your success and to get ahead – not just professionally but personally too.

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