Is Your Boss a Narcissist?

One of the most painful and frustrating corporate experiences is having a narcissist for a boss, am I right?

If you’re unlucky enough to fall into this category…

Your boss is most likely…

• Pretty self-absorbed…
• Disinterested in whether or not s/he hurts your feelings…
• Might present your work as their own…
• Regularly behaves in an inappropriate way…
• And may even inflate their own credibility and the impact they’re making to others.

Gee, it’s wearing having to manage someone like that!

 

 

But here’s a tip…

(Because I’ve had my fair share of narcissists to manage throughout my life too)…

And this tip could literally revolutionise how you’re approaching this tricky situation…

How to Manage a Narcissist

So here’s the tip:

Don’t judge narcissists on your own values…

Because you don’t value the same things as them…

(And you probably never will).

So let’s zoom in on this together shall we?

Your narcissist will have his/her own set of values…

Things like:

• Being superior…
• Themselves…
• Looking good…
• Getting ahead, no matter what…
• Their personal success…
• Oh, and did I mention ‘themselves’?  😉

 

 

Now where you’re probably getting really, REALLY frustrated…

Is that you’re probably judging their ‘terrible’ behaviour on your own values…

And so you’re expecting them to respond like you would…

But they never, ever will.

Say for example, your values are:

• Validating others
• Collaboration
• Getting results for the team
• Personal respect
• Listening to others’ ideas
• Kindness*

*(These might not be your exact values, but hopefully you get the idea)…

By judging them on your own values…

You’re going to be perpetually disappointed…

Because they will most likely never EVER behave in a way that meets your values.

 

​​​​​​

Narcissists are near-impossible to deal with…

But your frustration in dealing with them can be avoided…

If you just stop judging them on your own values.

Instead…

​​Start asking yourself what it is they value and it may go some way to explain their (terrible) behaviour.

Don’t Try to Change a Narcissist

A second tip before I go (and this one really comes from experience) is this:

Don’t waste your energy trying to change a narcissist or their behaviours!

Any advice you choose to give them will invariably fall on deaf ears.

Do yourself a massive favour…

C​​hange your environment instead and find people who do validate your inputs…

And not only will you be able to deliver better results at work…

You’ll be a lot happier too.​​​​..

And your happiness truly matters.

 

 

I’d love to help you get new outcomes in your career. If you’re ready and curious to learn more about yourself, schedule a 15 minute Career Strategy Call with me. Share your career challenges and I guarantee you’ll get some fresh thinking and actions straight away. Let’s get you back on track. Yup! It is that simple!